How to keep a relationship healthy, strong + happy

Every relationship is unique, but there are certain things that help to keep every romantic relationship healthy, strong and happy.  Relationships do have their ups and downs, so don’t expect them to be perfect all the time, especially if you live together.  You will get on each other’s nerves sometimes.  That’s only natural!

If you’re feeling like your relationship needs a little boost this year then here are some relationship resolutions to keep the spark going.  The article will finish with 3 secrets to a long lasting relationship from my own experience having been with my husband for nine years and still going strong!

Relationship resolutions for the New Year

Many people make New Year’s Resolutions to better their health or break free from a bad habit, but how about making a relationship resolution instead?

With two primary school aged children, our own businesses and a house we are still renovating, there is very little time left for our relationship.

Of course we are always in a relationship, but we rarely spend quality time together as husband and wife without other distractions.

Even when my mum has the children for a night, we will usually find ourselves at B&Q and cracking on with our home project!

Here are two relationship resolutions I’d like to make this year to help keep our long-term relationship healthy, strong and happy:

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  • Have regular date nights

We usually eat with the children and have a family dinner at around 5pm, then after the kids are in bed, we are doing housework and working.  We don’t usually spend much time together in an evening so we really need to set at least one night a week that is a dedicated date night.  We can watch a film together or eat together, but the most important thing is to spend some time together without work distractions, kids or housework.  I’d like to make it a once a week commitment for us to have some food together and watch a film.

  • Have a weekend away

We have a lot of DIY and home renovations to continue with, but these can easily absorb all our time when we are kid-free.  This year I’d like to make sure we go away at least twice when we have an evening without the children.  It’s so good to get out into the countryside, by the sea and explore somewhere together.  Long cliff walks and beach walks are the perfect opportunity for us to reconnect, talk without distraction and appreciate each other’s company.

To most people these may sound like really simple things.  Pre-kids I could have done these things every single week if I had wanted to!  But now we have responsibilities and family commitments, it makes even the simple act of watching a film together in an evening an often impossible task.  By the time the kids are in bed and everything is done, I usually have work to finish and so we rarely spend an evening committed to each other.

If you don’t have kids or already have the time to do the above then perhaps you could strengthen your relationship by making more time to listen to each other, do a new experience together or learn a new skill together.  There are so many relationship resolutions you can make to boost your relationship.

And if you are not in a relationship, but would like to be, then your New Year resolution can be to start dating and looking for love!  By using free dating sites such as matchmehappy you can meet other singles in your area and arrange to go on a date.  There’s nothing more exciting than when you start a new relationship and fall in love!

Once you’ve found the one and you’re in love, how do you make it last?

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3 secrets to a long lasting relationship

I’ve been with Ben for nine years and we are still both very committed to the relationship and plan on being together forever.  We are married, but in this day and age marriage doesn’t always mean forever, but we really hope it will for us.

Before Ben, my longest relationship was 3 years and I knew for the entire third year that it wasn’t going to work out.

So what’s different about me and Ben?

Reflecting on our relationship, here are three secrets to a long lasting relationship:

1.     Really find the right person

This is a must!  I’m sure most of you have been there – in a relationship where you’re infatuated with them, but argue all the time or they’re just not so infatuated with you?

Well, I have.

It’s a crappy feeling, but it’s best to break away and find the right person.

It’s hard, but you deserve to be with a person who loves you equally and feels exactly the same way about you.

Find the person who you don’t argue with about every little thing, because the relationship is easy.  You’re a match.

Sure, relationships can be hard, sometimes.  But if it’s hard most of the time then you’re probably not with the right person.

If you’re having the same arguments over and over again then it’s time to move on.

Sure, me and Ben have had a few arguments, but they really are rare.  When we do have an argument then we discuss it and come up with a solution and move on.

2.     Be friends too

Ben isn’t just my husband, but my best friend too.

He’s the only one I can tell anything to, including personal stuff, my honest opinion and any of my thoughts.

We have lots of the same interests, so it’s easy to watch something together, listen to music, eat out or have a day out without conflict.  We enjoy doing all sorts of things together and not just typical ‘relationship’ stuff.

Perhaps that’s what makes the relationship so easy – we have a lot of the same interests so we enjoy doing these things together as friends as well as partners.

Sure, there are some different things we like and we do on our own, but for the most part there’s no conflict of interest so no one feels obliged to do something they don’t enjoy.

3.     Compromise

Compromise is so important in relationships.  It’s not always all about you.  You have to respect their ideas, decisions, likes and interests too.  If you both feel really strongly about something and can’t agree, then you’re going to have to meet somewhere in the middle in order to move forward.

 

These are the three things that definitely keep our relationship strong, healthy and happy.  Spending quality time with each other, listening to one another, valuing the other’s opinion, trust and honesty are all the ingredients to make our long-term relationship work.

 

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How to keep a relationship healthy, strong + happy